Shock Line-up For Summer Skins

Fifth man at work - Do u want fruit in your cornflakes Muddy?

A shock line up has been released for team Curloneout for this weekends seasonal appearance at the Stirling Summer Skins.  Due to the absence of Mogi and Rory (they werent asked to play) David Edwards a lifetime Curloneout and Rangers supporter has been plucked from the curling scrapheap to slip into team curloneout for the Skins.  Edwards who in his day was up there with the very average has been floundering around the curling scene for a few years now.  Although a scottish champion in the past Edwards no longer meets the criteria to compete in the Royal Caledonian Curling Clique play-off for the European Championships.  It is reported a lack of commitment is the reason for Edwards' sudden lack of favour within the RC and the main reason to him going from golden boy to brush boy in the space of a season.  Thankfully for Dave his younger and better looking brother Kenny Chicken Wing stepped in during a team meeting to suggest the services of the washed up has-been. Reluctantly Gracie and Robbo were forced to agree to the transfer embargo and Dave was installed into the team with immediate effect.  Speaking from his bothy in teuchter-shire a down-beaten Edwards said "Its been a pretty hard few months for me since being dumped by the elite squad. i went above and beyond the call of duty as 5th man to Muddy and Tomtastic but yet my sucking up got me nowhere.  The call up from Gracie and the boys was such a boost to me and i cant wait to get back on the ice."  As a thank you, Dave boosted curloneouts morale with the news of a £100 cash injection into the skins kitty.  

Meanwhile in the run up to the weekends competition a young wannabe has layed down the challenge to Team Curloneout.  The Youngster whose identity has to be kept secret as he is a minor has challenged the team in a childish drinking competition.  Naturally the team has accepted the young Jedi's challenge and the details of how to destroy him best are currently being formulated.  

WATCH OUT- HMcM jr

Curloneout is BACK!

Well the season is almost upon us and after literally dozens of requests it was decided a wee update to the blog is in order.  Many things have changed since the end of the season, Robbo has been busy helping with hair and make up on the "Graham Norton Show" and Mogi has even grown into his new pair of school shoes.  Unfortunately some things dont change and Kenny ( Alan Sugar ) Edwards is still a loud, smelly, skinny gimp.  After a dissapponting end to the season Kenny immediately announced his retirement (spat the dummy out!) immediately and failed to serve his notice as detailed in his contact with Team Curloneout.  This breech of contract was taken very seriously and the teams legal team was instructed to file for damages.  After a drawn out court case an agreement between the two parties was met and Kenny agreed to actually buy the boys a round.  Since the case all is well and Kenny has been re-employed as official 5th man  and beer boy on a 3-year deal.  Skip Gracie said " We had hoped Kenny would be able to join us as 'Brushboy' but unfortunatrly was unable to meet the required standard to actually carry anything.  Fortunately we have found a more suitable role for him within the team set-up as 5th Man/Beerboy."  When asked to comment on his new post Kenny told us " I am delighted to be named Head Coach of team curloneout and will soon whip theese lads into shape."  It is clear there is a discrepency in what Kenny will actually do but thats par for the course.

rory exited to take up position.

With Kenny sliding out there was a spot opened up in the team and Robbo was clear he wanted his Dumfries Rent-boy Ruaraidh Whyte given the position at Second.  Ruaraidh will forever be refered to on this blog as Rory as his real name is far to hard to spell.  Rory told Skysports news last week - "I am pleased to be asked to slip into kennys hole and look forward to getting into the rhythm of things.  I have been working hard on the specialist shots required for team Curloneout - mostly Jaeger with some sambuca thrown in."
Rumour on the scene are rife that Whyte is severly worried about his ability to keep up with the pace but at the moment these speculations are unfounded.  


In The off season, the team are playing Stirling Skins  next weekend with a disjointed one off special team... Update to follow soon.


Finally a big shout out to all the lads at Dumfries Ice rink who smashed the world record for the longest game of curling.  Three members of the team took part (Duncan,Robbo and Rory) along with 7 others from Dumfries.  The lads put in a great effort through tears and injurys and managed to set a new Official Guinness World Record of 61 hours 39 minutes 33 seconds.  Well done to all involved.